Wait, what?
Sorry I've been gone for a while, gang. My laptop is headed for a landfill so finding ways to post isn't the easiest thing right now. That aside, I should be more on my game. I've also been taking an English course online (and getting top marks I must admit), but sadly--I don't get any of the credit. Anywho--I'm back.
I've been remiss in a bunch of things as of late. My workouts have been few and far between and I've been eating like a 12-year-old boy. Yeah, I know that's horrid.
It's actually one of the reasons that I'm determined to be better about writing. I feel like I have to be walking the walk when I'm writing. Otherwise, it's all hollow. So here I am.
I've tried explaining this to my dad. He doesn't quite get it I think, but I know he's trying to understand me a little better. 'A' for effort, Papa K.
Here's the best way that I can say it-- How can I tell people that they can find the time for any type of workout, when I can barely pull myself from my own bed in time for work? Yeah, that's just a tad hypocritical, no? Time to get on the straight and narrow.
I'm very fortunate that I have a marvelous support system. One of my nearest and dearest, my Jodie-kins, is a freaking beast when it comes to her workouts. She encourages me to do better, but also supports me through the times where I've bounced off the wagon. Way to be, duck! As a building, we have several women who are changing their routines and in doing so, their lives with their fitness. It's a great motivation that we all trade tips--not to mention nail polish tips and where you can find great deals on sunglasses. I have a great respect for these people. They don't ask for anything from one another--we just support one another in any way we can with our journeys. It's a shame that through most of mine, that hasn't been the case. I'm still learning daily that not everyone wants to see me succeed. Infact, there are those who would love to see me fail, but that's not an option for me. I will win. Not right away, but I will.
I know I'm all over the place tonight and I'm sorry, kids. I'm exhausted, but wanted to let those of you following along know that I'm back. Is there anything you want me to focus on for you? Let me know.
Fat Girl to Fit Chick
Stories from my journey; including all the things no one told me before I decided to change my life...
Still the Unfinished Swan...

Left: 250lbs Right: 140lbs
Monday, October 13, 2014
Thursday, August 21, 2014
Motives: Let's Be Honest Here
mo·tive
ˈmōtiv/
noun
I've read that the top motives for murder are as follows:
- gain (i.e. money)
- revenge
- jealousy
- personal vendetta
Oddly enough, most people would say that these are top motives for anything. If you ask people about getting healthy and what their motives are, they'll probably say, "I just wanted to get healthy!" To this I say, "Child please. We both know there are other motivating factors!" Not that there is anything wrong with that. There isn't. I'm for whatever motive gets you off your ass and moving. So let's talk about your anterior and your ulterior motives.
an·te·ri·or
anˈti(ə)rēər/
adjective
adjective: anterior
- 1.nearer the front
ul·te·ri·or
ˌəlˈti(ə)rēər/
adjective
- existing beyond what is obvious or admitted; intentionally hidden.
Just about everyone (including myself) will tell you that they lost weight to get healthy or to feel better and while yes, this is a huge reason behind doing all that work, there are some other reasons that exist that many people think they should be ashamed of. For instance:
- To look good
- Ain't nothing wrong with that! Most of us were raised that you should take some pride in your appearance. For me, I was sick of having to hunt for large sizes. I'd see cute things and half the time they weren't even available in plus sizes. As I started to drop weight, I started to realize that I wasn't hiding from my mirrors as much.
- Spite
- Ahh, spite. The very notion of doing something just because someone told you that you couldn't. Spite was also a motivator for me at one time. There were times that I'd hear the whispers of people discussing how maybe I'd lose a few pounds, but I'd never be able to get to the weight that I'd set as my goal. I hope that these people are reading this so that I may affectionately tell them to suck it.
- Revenge
- We've all had that breakup that ends up being better than any diet imaginable. The one where you just can't eat. Well, usually, within the first few pounds that disappear from a broken heart, you plotting to look your best so that he or she knows what they gave up, those heartless assholes! Yeah, been there too.
- Personal Gains
- I spent a number of years waiting tables. It was fun for the most part and I was good at it. There is one ugly truth in the serving industry though; the more "attractive" you are, the more money you're gonna make. Don't get me wrong, I made money, but as I said before--I was good at my job. If you'd taken me and one of the trimmer girls on the floor, she always seemed to make more money than I did. Go to your local bars--9 out of 10 times, the bartenders will be beautifully figured women regardless of talent. Please, do not mistake my saying this as me saying that all slim women are dumb or incompetent. I'm just saying that in a society that holds a certain standard of beauty, to make money, using your pretty helps. I was told on more than one occasion in the bars where I worked that I'd be a great bartender, if I just looked the part. Sad, but true.
So, here's the thing. I'm not saying that any of the above are "bad" motives. They work in the short term, BUT beware you'll need something bigger if you want to succeed. The danger of taking the above motives too far, is that they can turn you into an angry person if things don't go the way you plan. If you're reading this then you probably already know that life rarely goes the way we plan. Look at the big picture here. Get healthy and while you're doing that, you'll be hitting all the little ulterior motives at the same time. Think of it as a bonus and if things do go the way you planned, then you'll be hitting the jackpot.
Find what motivates you and remind yourself of it every day.

Every. Damn. Day.
Please share what motivates you in the comments below and you can also follow me on twitter at @unfinishedswan.

Wednesday, August 13, 2014
My Open Letter to Rush Limbaugh Regarding the Death of Robin Williams...
Dear Rush-
I googled you for the first and, God willing, only time ever today. Why? I was curious what would inspire such a tirade from Lewis Black. Not sure what I'm talking about? Well, upon logging into Facebook today, I saw that a good friend of mine had shared Mr. Black's update. You should see it, as you were obviously the catalyst to it.
I'll admit that I've never been a fan of yours. Your holier than thou attitude grates on me the way nails on a chalkboard irritates most people. I somehow doubt that you'll ever read this, and given that I agree with Aristotle's idea that "It is the sign of an intelligent mind to entertain a thought without necessarily agreeing with it", I know you'll not understand it if you do read it. Wait, does that sound callous or perhaps short-sighted? Am I not giving you enough credit? Aww, well sugar, I suggest you get used to it. I give credit only where it is due.
Please, allow me to explain a few things to you in reference to your comments regarding the "political" twist on the death of Robin Williams. I've read the transcript on your website a number of times and cannot help noticing that you have no grasp of what depression is as a sickness, nor what is truly being glorified in the media surrounding the death of Mr. Williams.
First off, you seem to think that it is only those in Washington that seem to look at news on a Global scale. Odd, I hadn't realized that relocating to South Florida meant that I was to be lumped in with the "average TMZ watchers" that you reference in your transcript. No, I don't live in the capitol, but being an educated, intelligent, and compassionate woman, I (like so many others) see not only the news that it thrown in my face by the major news media, but the stories that are shared throughout other channels. This includes social media. Fancy that! I hadn't realized your dislike of social media and I would applaud you for your vehemence against it, but I couldn't help but notice in reading your transcript on your website, that you advertise your own Facebook page there as well. I was even given the opportunity to share the article on my page. Amazingly ironic that you yourself said, "You have so many people on social media who so desperately want fame. You know it and I know it. " and here you are, on social media-- seeking fame. Looks like you know and I know it--not to mention the rest of the world.
You state in your transcript that you've never felt that suicide should be glorified. Umm, I think you've missed the point of the coverage on Mr. Williams. No one is broadcasting "Look at Robin! So brave he killed himself!" The bravery, the glorification is for the man who battled for so long. It is for the man who put others needs ahead of his own by making sure that others were laughing, even though he could not. Do you know anything about depression, sir? Have you battled it? Or do you, like many others, believe that because you plug the word into the Google box on the interwebs and read the first sentence of the results you see there, that you're an expert? Let me give you a crash course in depression from someone who has battled it for longer than I'd care to admit. Depression is that listless feeling that would keep you eternally in bed because you think that you've nothing to contribute to the world. Depression is when you stop answering or making calls because you don't believe that anyone has anything to say to you because they don't really wish to speak to you. Depression is seeing a car approaching while at a stop light and thinking that it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if it didn't stop and just hit you instead. Depression is sleepless nights at war with yourself imagining how much easier your family and so-called loved ones would have it if you were gone. It is far from the selfish act that you paint it to be. Until you've lain awake at night with these thoughts, you know nothing of depression. You cannot fathom the ups when you realize your own value again, nor the downs when all the world is a darker shade of gray, yet you go on because it is expected of you. You're clueless to the exhaustion after a day of convincing everyone that things are great before you go home to be alone with the demons you face.
I wouldn't wish that sort of pain and anguish on my worst enemy, sir, but I can't say that if I saw you in those depths, that I'd extend a hand to pull you out.
Robin Williams was a good man by all accounts. His life, his work, his battle should be glorified! If for no other reason than to raise awareness of a disease that most people think is little more than mind over matter. You're worried about the coverage inspiring copycats? Exactly how daft are you? Even the most addled mind knows that without the star power, good works and decades of accolades, a suicide would not inspire the infamy of that of Mr. Williams. Do you really believe that some random kid who wants to be popular is sitting around thinking that if he kills himself, CNN is going to be at his school conducting interviews about him the next day? If so, you might want to rethink that. It is true that anyone would love to receive the accolades that Robin Williams has inspired, but you'd have to be that kind of human being to receive them. Don't worry, you're in no danger of that when you go, sir.
You state in your broadcast the reasons why Mr. Williams committed suicide. I'd not realized that he'd told anyone his reasons. Wait, he didn't? Imagine that. For any so-called "news" organization to give reasons for his suicide is laughable. Not to mention irresponsible journalism, but you should be an expert on that by now, right? Your assumption that the "leftist ways" are to blame for this instead of the disorder he faced takes you from irresponsible to delusional. Good luck grasping at those straws.
In parting, I would make a recommendation to you. At the end of your transcript, you asked, "What do you think the percentage is of media people who are actually low-information, incompetent people themselves? " Are you making a list? If so, I hope you remember to include your name first and go from there.
With patent dislike-
Amy Klacik
FULL TRANSCRIPT
I googled you for the first and, God willing, only time ever today. Why? I was curious what would inspire such a tirade from Lewis Black. Not sure what I'm talking about? Well, upon logging into Facebook today, I saw that a good friend of mine had shared Mr. Black's update. You should see it, as you were obviously the catalyst to it.
FUCK YOU Rush Limbaugh. Your statements were beyond cruel and stupid. They were intolerable. Enough is enough from you. You are an idiot. Don't you ever demean the death of another human being. He was my friend. You disgust me.
Please, allow me to explain a few things to you in reference to your comments regarding the "political" twist on the death of Robin Williams. I've read the transcript on your website a number of times and cannot help noticing that you have no grasp of what depression is as a sickness, nor what is truly being glorified in the media surrounding the death of Mr. Williams.
First off, you seem to think that it is only those in Washington that seem to look at news on a Global scale. Odd, I hadn't realized that relocating to South Florida meant that I was to be lumped in with the "average TMZ watchers" that you reference in your transcript. No, I don't live in the capitol, but being an educated, intelligent, and compassionate woman, I (like so many others) see not only the news that it thrown in my face by the major news media, but the stories that are shared throughout other channels. This includes social media. Fancy that! I hadn't realized your dislike of social media and I would applaud you for your vehemence against it, but I couldn't help but notice in reading your transcript on your website, that you advertise your own Facebook page there as well. I was even given the opportunity to share the article on my page. Amazingly ironic that you yourself said, "You have so many people on social media who so desperately want fame. You know it and I know it. " and here you are, on social media-- seeking fame. Looks like you know and I know it--not to mention the rest of the world.
You state in your transcript that you've never felt that suicide should be glorified. Umm, I think you've missed the point of the coverage on Mr. Williams. No one is broadcasting "Look at Robin! So brave he killed himself!" The bravery, the glorification is for the man who battled for so long. It is for the man who put others needs ahead of his own by making sure that others were laughing, even though he could not. Do you know anything about depression, sir? Have you battled it? Or do you, like many others, believe that because you plug the word into the Google box on the interwebs and read the first sentence of the results you see there, that you're an expert? Let me give you a crash course in depression from someone who has battled it for longer than I'd care to admit. Depression is that listless feeling that would keep you eternally in bed because you think that you've nothing to contribute to the world. Depression is when you stop answering or making calls because you don't believe that anyone has anything to say to you because they don't really wish to speak to you. Depression is seeing a car approaching while at a stop light and thinking that it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if it didn't stop and just hit you instead. Depression is sleepless nights at war with yourself imagining how much easier your family and so-called loved ones would have it if you were gone. It is far from the selfish act that you paint it to be. Until you've lain awake at night with these thoughts, you know nothing of depression. You cannot fathom the ups when you realize your own value again, nor the downs when all the world is a darker shade of gray, yet you go on because it is expected of you. You're clueless to the exhaustion after a day of convincing everyone that things are great before you go home to be alone with the demons you face.
I wouldn't wish that sort of pain and anguish on my worst enemy, sir, but I can't say that if I saw you in those depths, that I'd extend a hand to pull you out.
Robin Williams was a good man by all accounts. His life, his work, his battle should be glorified! If for no other reason than to raise awareness of a disease that most people think is little more than mind over matter. You're worried about the coverage inspiring copycats? Exactly how daft are you? Even the most addled mind knows that without the star power, good works and decades of accolades, a suicide would not inspire the infamy of that of Mr. Williams. Do you really believe that some random kid who wants to be popular is sitting around thinking that if he kills himself, CNN is going to be at his school conducting interviews about him the next day? If so, you might want to rethink that. It is true that anyone would love to receive the accolades that Robin Williams has inspired, but you'd have to be that kind of human being to receive them. Don't worry, you're in no danger of that when you go, sir.
You state in your broadcast the reasons why Mr. Williams committed suicide. I'd not realized that he'd told anyone his reasons. Wait, he didn't? Imagine that. For any so-called "news" organization to give reasons for his suicide is laughable. Not to mention irresponsible journalism, but you should be an expert on that by now, right? Your assumption that the "leftist ways" are to blame for this instead of the disorder he faced takes you from irresponsible to delusional. Good luck grasping at those straws.
In parting, I would make a recommendation to you. At the end of your transcript, you asked, "What do you think the percentage is of media people who are actually low-information, incompetent people themselves? " Are you making a list? If so, I hope you remember to include your name first and go from there.
With patent dislike-
Amy Klacik
FULL TRANSCRIPT
Friday, August 1, 2014
Means, Motive & Opportunity: The 3 Things You Need To Make The Change or Be A Murder Suspect
Means, Motive & Opportunity:
The 3 Things You Need To Make The Change or Be A Murder Suspect
This is kind of a big topic to cover in one fell swoop, so I'm thinking we're gonna cover this in 3 parts. Sound like a plan? I think so and let's face it, I'm the one typing--so follow along.
I grew up watching a lot of Law & Order. No, I mean, like, a lot. Like, the theme was the 1st ringtone I ever bought when I got a cellphone. It must be genetic. My mom loved Law & Order. If there was a marathon on, she'd watch it--and let's be honest, there is always a Law & Order marathon on! That being said, while I was growing up watching Jerry Orbach (who was the best detective on any incarnation of Law & Order) catch the bad guys, I feel like I got a pretty decent education in criminal justice. Yes, most of it is very "Hollywood", but I actually retained a lot from television. We'll discuss the medical knowledge that I got from watching M*A*S*H another night.
![]() |
Jerry Orbach |
In recent years, my best friend got me into Psych on USA. If you've not seen it and you have a love of random movie, television, and music references (and I assume you do since you're reading this and I pepper them into everything), check it out. Anyway, it's a show about a fake psychic who helps real detectives solve crimes.
Being the curious type, I always wanted to know who done it, so I guess I gravitated to these shows that required thought. This may be the reason I don't do thoughtless reality TV. Sweet Baby J! Don't let me get started on that! We will cover that nonsense another night when I can figure out how to justify such a tirade!
Wow, sorry for the tangent, but where was I? Oh yeah, what I learned. So, apart from my miranda rights, I learned that the three things needed to be considered a viable murder suspect are...
- Means
- Motive
- Opportunity
Who would've thought that these are the same three things you're going to need if you want to change your life. Tonight, we'll talk about having the "means"...
means
mēnz/
noun
.
While in a murder case, I'm sure that Lennie and the others would be looking at the first definition above, I'm going to talk more about the second part.
Money
People will tell you that money doesn't buy happiness or that it can't solve all of your problems, but can we just be honest here? I would say 90% of my problems would, in fact, be easier (if not solved) if I had the cash flow to handle them.
When I made a decision to do things healthier, I found that it was not going to be cheap. In fact, if I'd followed all of the advice I saw online and got from other people, I would have never been able to afford it. Putting my medication costs (which are extensive) off to one side, the cost of a gym membership, good vitamins/supplements, healthy food, and the proper equipment to workout regularly (i.e. sneakers and workout clothing) added up quickly!
I'm a big believer in the saying, "Necessity is the mother of invention". It was time to start inventing! Once I had health insurance, I could get the cost of my medication down with generics. My gym membership offered corporate rates and my dad was good enough to help with that since he knew how important it was to me. Healthy food was not so clear cut. It did require some fancy footwork and imagination.

I was reading a lot about clean eating and what kind of meals I'd need to plan out and how the best way was to cook at the beginning of the week and portion things out. That required a good amount of food. Now, I was lucky here. My big brother, David works for Costco (as do I, but it's better that we not work in the same warehouse--or area for that matter). Because of his job there (before I got my job there), I was able to get one of the three family memberships he had to give away. Being able to buy my proteins (meats, eggs, and even peanut butter) there, helped enormously. If you are not a Costco member, do you know someone who is who might want to take you shopping? You can shop with cash or a debit card as someone's guest. FYI- You may NOT borrow someone's card and go shopping. Don't be that asshole. We don't like to have to call you out at the register, but we will. If you don't know a Costco member, get a membership. A basic membership is $55 for the year and totally worth it--especially if your local warehouse has a gas station. Okay, that's the end of my advertisement for Costco. You could substitute BJ's or Sam's Club in, but you will not find the same selection or quality of meats.

While I did buy some of my produce at Costco when I started out, I began to look at alternatives. I am one person afterall and I couldn't freeze lettuce the way I could chicken. With just a few Google searches, I found a few listings for local farmer's markets and the schedules and locations. If you like fruits and veggies, a good farmer's market is like freaking Candy Land! The trick is to go with a list! Otherwise, you run the risk of buying too much and it going to waste. Yup, I learned that one the hard way. You can plan it all out and most of the vendors will work with you on the price (particularly when they get to know you).

As for your healthy living equipment? Well, below are some points as to what you may need and how I got it on a budget. FYI- Like Phyllis Nefler (aka-Shelley Long) from Troop Beverly Hills, I too have a black belt in shopping.


- Sneakers: If there is one thing that is a must if you're going to be more active, it's a good pair of sneakers. Regardless of the brand you love, there are places to shop to avoid the hefty price tag of your normal Foot Locker. Hit up TJ Maxx, Marshalls and if you have a DSW Shoe Warehouse, that'll work too. If you can't find what you want and you have the time to wait, may I suggest eBay? I know it sounds dumb, but I am an eBay guru! Search for what you need and BOOM, you'll have tons of results to sift through.
- My best example? eBay find: Puma race boots. Retail: $135 I Paid: under $50 (including shipping)

- Workout Clothing: Again, all your local TJ Maxx-like places are good, along with any clearance section you can find. For me? I workout and run in tennis skirts. I look better in skirts than shorts and since they have shorts underneath, they are super comfy and I'm not showing my cash and prizes off to anyone while I'm working out. Where can you get them super cheap most days? Thrift stores. I live near a Good Will Super Store and I bargain hunt there regularly. Some people don't jive with thrift stores, but I love them. Think of it as an adventure. Some people think they are too good to shop at a thrift store and to those boojee people I say, "Child please." Tim Gunn wants you to "Make it work" and sometimes Good Will helps with that.
- Recent Good Will haul: 2 Nike tennis skirts, 2 tube shirts to walk in (I hate tan lines), 1 pair of jeans and a knick knack for my living room: $10.
- Supplements: I found good deals by asking my doctor where to find good deals. When it comes to your vitamins, I found it was often better to spend a few extra dollars for the good stuff. Discuss with your doctor what you should be taking.
- Other equipment: Time to let your fingers do the walking, kids. Look in your local yellow pages (probably online because who the hell has a phone book anymore?) for a used sporting goods store. Near Fort Lauderdale (my hood) we have a place called Play It Again Sports. You can find used weights, resistance bands and even things like golf clubs there for way less than normal retail prices.
Believe me when I tell you, I make poverty work. If I can get the supplies together on my meager earnings, you can too. You have the means, my friends. With that knowledge, rest assured, you're a third of the way there.
Tomorrow, we'll talk about motives.

Thursday, July 31, 2014
Oh, NO They DIDN'T!
So far, this little project of mine has proven to been quite fulfilling and I'd like to think it's been pretty informative too. Yeah, that's all well and good, but I'm more of a storyteller than a teach I think. I don't know actually. If you know me personally, what do you think?
Regardless of all that, I thought since I'm short on time tonight (I'm mooching free wifi from the Starbucks where I work), I'd take a few minutes to relay some of the more idiotic things people have said to be both when I was heavier and now that I've lightened my personal load.
Regardless of all that, I thought since I'm short on time tonight (I'm mooching free wifi from the Starbucks where I work), I'd take a few minutes to relay some of the more idiotic things people have said to be both when I was heavier and now that I've lightened my personal load.
I understand that when you've known someone for a long time (even as an acquaintance), sometimes you might get a little too comfortable and overstep your boundaries. This happened when I first started working at Costco. Working in my warehouse was a woman who used to be a busser when I worked at Shula's On The Beach in Fort Lauderdale. We'd known each other while we were both there, but I'd by no means, classify us as "friends". She wasn't the most industrious person and with at least 20 years of age between us, we didn't really have anything to talk about.
About a month into me working at Costco, I was leaving the warehouse while she was working at the door (checking receipts and whatnot). I had her look in my purse to make sure I'd not pilfered any big screen TV's or a few dozen batteries and as I was about to walk away, she pulled me to one side of the door. "Mamaaaa," she looked so concerned before asking, "are you pregnant? You got so fat since we worked together! You have baby, right?" Every woman who has been wrongly questioned about pregnancy can attest to the red haze that suddenly rolls over your vision when this happens. It's like the world spins for a moment, everything gets red and foggy and you can't really breathe normally. Thankfully, I don't have full blown anger issues. No, I wouldn't kill anyone. I won't commit to not wanting to maim anyone though.
In this situation in particular, I was especially offended. (side note: anyone who knows me, knows that it's almost impossible to offend me.) It's not as if this woman was a damn supermodel! No, she's damn near trollish by all accounts. Seriously, picture a troll in your mind. Go ahead, I'll wait.
Got it?
Does this help?

So, who the hell thinks it's a good idea to call me out on my chubbiness? Did she think that it could have somehow escaped me that I was fat? Was she under the impression that I didn't own mirrors? Either way I was shocked when I shook my head to signal that, NO, I was sure as hell NOT pregnant. My friends would usually tell you that I'm a master at the witty retort, but for a second, I was caught flat footed. Luckily for me, it was only a second. Before I walked away, I just smiled and said, "No, I'm not pregnant, Mama. I'm working on it though. I'm just glad I'm still young enough to do something about it. I'd hate to get to your age and then realize I was beyond help." Her eyes got wide--I smiled my sweetest smile and walked away.
Now, let me be clear about something. I don't believe it's every too late to get healthy and start doing things right. BUT, if you're gonna play dirty by asking such a personal and damn near intrusive question, I will go there and hit you below the knees. I'll be tactful about it, but you will in fact learn your lesson.
Again at work, recently, I saw a member who I've known for years. Their family shops pretty often, but I'd not seen them as of late. When I did, we spoke for a bit and while the wife politely complimented me and asked about I'd done, her husband suddenly said, "Wow, I'll bet your sex life is so much better now! You can probably get it whenever you want it!" I'm not sure who was more rattled by the statement; me, his wife, or him when he realized how furious she was.
I'm of the opinion that knowing your audience in any setting is important. You've got to know what you can say and where you need to draw the line. In this case, I figured given where he'd just drawn the line, I could go pretty damn far. So...I did.
"Well, not that it would be anyone's business, but I've never had an issue there. Oh, and two other things. 1. I'm a woman and can therefore always get it whenever I want it. And 2. I dropped weight, not my fucking morals."
I'm not sure this post really has a moral to the story today. That might be because I'm exhausted. Or it could be just a PSA to say, "BE PREPARED." You're gonna hear all sorts or weird things along the way. Some people will be happy for you., some will hate you. If nothing else, you will learn who your friends are. Also, if I could recommend one thing through all the BS people will say to you--keep your sense of humor about things. You're gonna need it.

Wednesday, July 30, 2014
Doing The Math: How Small Steps Add Up To Big Things

I'm noticing that a lot of people think that to change your lifestyle and therein, your life, you've got to overhaul everything overnight and start fresh! Yeah, I'm sorry, but in the illustrious words of Kimberly "Sweet Brown" Wilkins, "Ain't nobody got time for that!" A major overnight overhaul would take time and money that I, for one, did not and do not have. Some of us, after all, are ballin' on a budget as they say (by "they" I mean these crazy kids on the street.)

Due to these restrictions and partially because I didn't want to lose what's left of my sanity (people who know me would tell you I've none left to lose, but they're just as looney as I am, I assure you), I started with making tiny changes and over the first few weeks, they started to make a difference. Remember, you're not going to achieve huge results overnight! It's took more than a day to gain it, it's gonna take more than a day to lose it. I know that I struggled with that thought for a long time. I think anyone who has tries traditional "dieting" has. You start thinking, "Well, I ate healthy today and I worked out today, so I better wake up skinny tomorrow!", right? I did it too and looking back now, I see that it was those thoughts that set me up to be disappointed and then discouraged as time went on.
Most people think that little changes can't really amount to anything big, but I think there if something fundamentally wrong with that line of thinking. If you think about it, the Grand Canyon was formed by water over time. Yes, we want to achieve results faster than that, but you get my drift, right?
There are things that you can easily change and then move up to harder things. This is just like you would do it at the gym. You don't start out benchpressing Buicks. You start with the bar and work your way up. This is not a Rocky movie. Getting leaned out and bulked up while "Hearts On Fire" plays is not real life, but over time with the little changes you make, you can, in fact, defeat the Ivan Drago that is your weight/body issues.
Some things to consider trying...
Little Change to BIG Difference
1. STOP looking for a close parking spot! God saw fit to give you two good legs. USE them! There are plenty of spots further back and your car stands less of a chance of getting hit. That's a win/win situation.
- If you're walking more, you're burning more calories. You're working your muscles more and you won't even notice at first--then BAM!
- Processed foods are full of the junk you don't need and seldom has the nutrients that you do need. As you replace things, buy more raw food (proteins, veggies, fruits, etc…)
- This is a no-brainer, peeps. Also, stairs are great for your ass. Trust me on this.
- The optical illusion that the plate is full helps you feel full. Silly, right? Well, not really. A standard dinner plate in Europe is 8-9 inches. Here? 12-15 inches. I know I was taught to clear my plate as a kid and a bigger plate means you put more on it and then you clear it. It's actually pretty brilliant when you think about it.
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Hey Baby Girl, 1 more set, okay? |
- Same idea as before…burn more calories and you'll start seeing a difference.
- Packing a lunch full of good food means you won't be going out for a burger and fries. Set yourself up for the success you're looking for and if you HAVE to buy lunch, try to split something with a friend. Jodie and I split lunch at work all the time. Also, having a lunch buddy means that you'll have someone to encourage good decisions. Remember, having support can help you get the results that you want.
Here's the thing to remember-- DO NOT GET DISCOURAGED!
You're in the for the long haul and you're going to move up to bigger changes and better things, but this is a good place to start!

Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Backsliding -vs- Yo-Yo Dieting: The Ability to Learn From Mistakes
So, my friend Christine Radochonski has asked me to talk a little about "backsliding" and I thought it would pair well with yo-yo dieting.
Christine Radochonski Girl, this is badass. One thing I'd like to see-- just in general-- is talk about "backsliding." Whether you ever did or not I feel like a lot of people throw their hands up and say, "I don't have the willpower!" FALSE. We all do, but it's about managing. I would love to see what you have to say.
Excellent post
Excellent post
As you can see, this Chicago girl is not only great for my ever-fragile ego, but is also posing a thought provoking issue for discussion. Well, let's start at the very beginning, as Fraulein Maria taught us in The Sound of Music, it's a very good place to start.
*Side note: After making that reference, I just sat here and sang Do, Re, Me from The Sound of Music to myself. Don't judge me.
What the f*%^ IS this BACKSLIDING you speak of?
back·slide
ˈbakˌslīd/
verb
gerund or present participle: backsliding
So, even I was shocked with I saw the definition above. Apparently, the term is so prevalent to dieting that they used it as the best example in a sentence about dieting. Well, isn't that just freaking peachy? The fact of the matter is, very few people have a completely linear journey when it comes to losing weight (especially when it is a significant amount). We all face temptation. We all get cravings. Ladies, we all fight the battle of water weight and the nightmare of PMS.

I am happy to report that I am no different! I was a pro at yo-yo dieting for a very long time. I could drop 15 lbs, but then magically I would gain back 20lbs. So, then I'd lose 25lbs and then, POOF! Up 35 lbs. To be honest, this is a pretty honest depiction of what it's like for women who struggle with their weight...

This was one of the ways that I found out that fad diets were linked to yo-yo dieting and that "dieting" isn't really the answer to anything. Remember, you aren't dieting once you commit to this! You're changing your lifestyle! Yes, that's hokey, but it's also true. Here's the skinny on what happens when you yo-yo diet--

It's no coincidence that it's a circle. If there is one thing that The Lion King taught me, it's that there's a circle of life--also, never trust your uncle named Scar.
Now, backsliding isn't really the same as yo-yo dieting. The yo-yo effect is more of a derailing of your lifestyle. It's what happens when you give up, only to realize that mistake once you've pack weight back on to the extreme of ending up heavier than before.

When you backslide, it's a temporary setback. When you're really committed to the new lifestyle that you're creating, you'll find your way back on the wagon. It's very much the same analogy of falling off your bike. You've got to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back on if you want to get anywhere. Yes, I do have episodes when I backslide. Some worse than others. Usually, I chalk it up to stress or life trauma in some way.
Recently, I've actually battled with this. Sometimes, I am guilty of losing track of what I'm doing. In May of this year, my stepmother passed away suddenly. I confess that in the stress of loss, going home, a funeral, and trying to help not only my father, but my two stepbrothers through their own grief, I added weight. Didn't happen overnight, but I suddenly woke up after I'd been home for two weeks after the funeral and realized that my favorite jeans were harder to button.
What had I been doing differently? What had I not been doing at all? What was I doing to excess?
It was a number of things.
What I did differently: While I was home, I ate whatever was put in front of me and we all know that during a time like that, the only food around tends to be comfort food.

What I hadn't been doing: I wasn't keeping myself accountable. I use different apps to log my food and exercise on a regular basis. I hadn't been doing that. I also wasn't working out. I was listless, but so exhausted that I wasn't moving to do anything unless I had to be at work.
What was I doing to excess: Eating and sleeping. It's that simple.
There's a certain amount of shame involved when you backslide. For me, it's not because someone may notice or say something about it. It's more personal than that for me. I may be categorized as "self deprecating" by most people. I can not only laugh at myself, but have no trouble with berating myself. It's not a good thing by most standards, but I've always explained it to people that it's something of a defense mechanism. If I've already shot me down, how can I be hurt when someone else does it? I can't. Like I said, not good, but another thing I'm working on. So, for me, when I backslide, I've let me down. I'm supposed to be smarter than this, darnit! I am, obviously, but it doesn't mean I don't have my moments and thankfully, I'm learning to accept that I'm human. I get over it.

Backsliding isn't only about willpower. It's about consciousness. Each day we need to make a conscious decision about how we're going to live that day; including what we eat, drink, and how we spend our energy. I suppose most people would say that willpower is linked to that, but I think it's more about clear thinking. For me, it's about acknowledging why I'm making these decisions, how they will benefit me, and understanding that whatever I decide, I have to live with the consequence.
Do not equate backsliding with failure. You aren't a failure. It's a detour perhaps, but you can't let it allow you to get lost of the journey. Find your way back to the right road. Use the tools at your disposal, whether they are apps, measurements, or your best girl friends who you share your journey with. I'm somewhat put off by women who like to announce that they did this or that on their own. "By myself!" Why is that supposed to be a good thing? No one is saying you have to do it by yourself. The resources are out there to help with the cravings, the motivation, and the moves to get results. You don't get extra points for doing it alone. If you choose to do it alone, that's fine, but don't go looking for applause. My friends and family would tell you that I didn't share the details of my weightloss with them, but that doesn't mean I was alone.
More about my motivation and support system another day, but let me close by saying this again. Backsliding happens. When it does, you've got 2 options.
- Let it detail you from all the work you've done.
- Let it teach you why you've been working so hard and get your shit together.
That pretty much sums it up.

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