Still the Unfinished Swan...

Still the Unfinished Swan...
Left: 250lbs Right: 140lbs

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Backsliding -vs- Yo-Yo Dieting: The Ability to Learn From Mistakes

So, my friend Christine Radochonski has asked me to talk a little about "backsliding" and I thought it would pair well with yo-yo dieting.

Christine Radochonski Girl, this is badass. One thing I'd like to see-- just in general-- is talk about "backsliding." Whether you ever did or not I feel like a lot of people throw their hands up and say, "I don't have the willpower!" FALSE. We all do, but it's about managing. I would love to see what you have to say.

Excellent post 

As you can see, this Chicago girl is not only great for my ever-fragile ego, but is also posing a thought provoking issue for discussion.  Well, let's start at the very beginning, as Fraulein Maria taught us in The Sound of Music, it's a very good place to start.  

*Side note: After making that reference, I just sat here and sang Do, Re, Me from The Sound of Music to myself.  Don't judge me. 

What the f*%^ IS this BACKSLIDING you speak of?

back·slide
ˈbakˌslīd/
verb
gerund or present participle: backsliding
  1. relapse into bad ways or error.
    "converted vegetarians backslide to T-bones"
    synonyms:relapselapseregressweaken, lose one's resolve, give in to temptation,go astray, leave the straight and narrow, fall off the wagon
    "many things can cause dieters to backslide"

So, even I was shocked with I saw the definition above.  Apparently, the term is so prevalent to dieting that they used it as the best example in a sentence about dieting.  Well, isn't that just freaking peachy?  The fact of the matter is, very few people have a completely linear journey when it comes to losing weight (especially when it is a significant amount).  We all face temptation.  We all get cravings. Ladies, we all fight the battle of water weight and the nightmare of PMS. 
Feed a cold. Starve a fever. Give PMS ANYTHING it wants.

I am happy to report that I am no different!  I was a pro at yo-yo dieting for a very long time.  I could drop 15 lbs, but then magically I would gain back 20lbs. So, then I'd lose 25lbs and then, POOF! Up 35 lbs.  To be honest, this is a pretty honest depiction of what it's like for women who struggle with their weight...

The extended effects of yo-yo dieting. This is exactly why you DO NOT DIET. No one ever likes hearing this out of my mouth, but the only way you are going to lose weights and keep it off is to make a LIFESTYLE CHANGE. Eating healthy and exercise. Dieting will set you up for failure. Every time.

This was one of the ways that I found out that fad diets were linked to yo-yo dieting and that "dieting" isn't really the answer to anything.  Remember, you aren't dieting once you commit to this!  You're changing your lifestyle! Yes, that's hokey, but it's also true.  Here's the skinny on what happens when you yo-yo diet--
yo-yo-dieting

It's no coincidence that it's a circle.  If there is one thing that The Lion King taught me, it's that there's a circle of life--also, never trust your uncle named Scar. 

Now, backsliding isn't really the same as yo-yo dieting.  The yo-yo effect is more of a derailing of your lifestyle.  It's what happens when you give up, only to realize that mistake once you've pack weight back on to the extreme of ending up heavier than before. 

No more yo-yo dieting!

When you backslide, it's a temporary setback.  When you're really committed to the new lifestyle that you're creating, you'll find your way back on the wagon. It's very much the same analogy of falling off your bike.  You've got to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back on if you want to get anywhere. Yes, I do have episodes when I backslide.  Some worse than others.  Usually, I chalk it up to stress or life trauma in some way. 

Recently, I've actually battled with this.  Sometimes, I am guilty of losing track of what I'm doing.  In May of this year, my stepmother passed away suddenly.  I confess that in the stress of loss, going home, a funeral, and trying to help not only my father, but my two stepbrothers through their own grief, I added weight.  Didn't happen overnight, but I suddenly woke up after I'd been home for two weeks after the funeral and realized that my favorite jeans were harder to button.  

What had I been doing differently?  What had I not been doing at all?  What was I doing to excess?  

It was a number of things. 

What I did differently: While I was home, I ate whatever was put in front of me and we all know that during a time like that, the only food around tends to be comfort food.  

Why can’t I be comforted by carrots? Why does it have to be chocolate or wine? | Snarkecards

What I hadn't been doing: I wasn't keeping myself accountable.  I use different apps to log my food and exercise on a regular basis.  I hadn't been doing that.  I also wasn't working out.  I was listless, but so exhausted that I wasn't moving to do anything unless I had to be at work.  

What was I doing to excess: Eating and sleeping.  It's that simple.  

There's a certain amount of shame involved when you backslide.  For me, it's not because someone may notice or say something about it.  It's more personal than that for me.  I may be categorized as "self deprecating" by most people.  I can not only laugh at myself, but have no trouble with berating myself.  It's not a good thing by most standards, but I've always explained it to people that it's something of a defense mechanism.  If I've already shot me down, how can I be hurt when someone else does it?  I can't.  Like I said, not good, but another thing I'm working on.  So, for me, when I backslide, I've let me down.  I'm supposed to be smarter than this, darnit! I am, obviously, but it doesn't mean I don't have my moments and thankfully, I'm learning to accept that I'm human.  I get over it.  
You hit like a BITCH!!!

Backsliding isn't only about willpower.  It's about consciousness.  Each day we need to make a conscious decision about how we're going to live that day; including what we eat, drink, and how we spend our energy.  I suppose most people would say that willpower is linked to that, but I think it's more about clear thinking.  For me, it's about acknowledging why I'm making these decisions, how they will benefit me, and understanding that whatever I decide, I have to live with the consequence.  

Do not equate backsliding with failure. You aren't a failure.  It's a detour perhaps, but you can't let it allow you to get lost of the journey.  Find your way back to the right road.  Use the tools at your disposal, whether they are apps, measurements, or your best girl friends who you share your journey with.  I'm somewhat put off by women who like to announce that they did this or that on their own. "By myself!"  Why is that supposed to be a good thing?  No one is saying you have to do it by yourself.  The resources are out there to help with the cravings, the motivation, and the moves to get results.  You don't get extra points for doing it alone.  If you choose to do it alone, that's fine, but don't go looking for applause.  My friends and family would tell you that I didn't share the details of my weightloss with them, but that doesn't mean I was alone.  

More about my motivation and support system another day, but let me close by saying this again.  Backsliding happens.  When it does, you've got 2 options.
  1. Let it detail you from all the work you've done.
  2. Let it teach you why you've been working so hard and get your shit together.  
That pretty much sums it up.  

What I Learned From The Great Backslide of 2013...




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